


Your Side of the Bed

by Top1PercentFics



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-03-26
Packaged: 2019-12-18 04:33:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18242459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Top1PercentFics/pseuds/Top1PercentFics
Summary: After a fight with Bucky, you’re laying on your side of the bed wondering if he’s coming home and what the fight means for the future of your relationship.**Based loosely on Your Side of the Bed by Little Big Town**





	Your Side of the Bed

It was pushing 2 am as I laid in my room staring out the window at the crescent shape of the moon as it hung in the night sky. I replayed the fight with Bucky from earlier in the day over and over in my mind. I couldn’t even remember what the fight had started over. It was something so small and insignificant that I hadn’t even thought about it until he snapped.

After a bit of yelling from both sides, he walked out of my room claiming he was going for a run with Steve without so much as a second glance at me.

He hadn’t made any form of contact with me since. No calls. No texts. Nothing.

Usually, I wouldn’t be so uneasy about it, but I knew he was leaving on a mission in a matter of hours. It wasn’t the most robust mission he’d be on, and it should be pretty straight forward. But I had been involved with the Avengers long enough to know that there was so such thing as a standard mission. Each mission came with risk. The biggest of which being Bucky not coming home. The idea of him leaving for the mission without saying goodbye left a nauseous feeling in my stomach.

It was an unspoken tradition that had started between the two of us several months ago. The night before either of us left on a mission we would spend it together. It was a way for us to clear our minds and just relax in the solitude of the other before heading out into the chaos with the team.

But tonight it seemed that our tradition would be broken. I sighed and rolled my head over to look at the other side of the bed. His side of the bed. Sure, he had his own living space in the compound, but he spent more time in mine than he did his, so really my suite was like his in a way. In fact the few times I had been in his living quarters it didn’t seem that he had personalized anything. Everything in the space were the basics that Tony had put in each of the rooms.

My eyes moved from the moon to the nightstand on his side of the bed. My lips curved into a smile when I saw the picture of the two of us sitting in a frame. It was a picture Nat took at a dinner party Tony had thrown a month or two back. We were sitting together, and Bucky had his arm on the back of the sofa as he looked over at me. I held my cocktail carefully in my hands as I laughed at something he had said. We were both leaning in towards the other, and it looked like we were the only two in the room. Both of us were seemingly unaffected by the other people that were in the room.

I wasn’t sure what it was about the picture, but it had always made me smile when I looked at it. Maybe it was the smile on Bucky’s face. I knew he still had nightmares from his past, so the carefree smile and the way his eyes crinkled at the sides in the pictures made my heart flutter. Maybe it was the look in his eyes. That hint of caring and perhaps even something more as he looked at me. Maybe it was the way he was leaned in towards me, hanging on to every word I said.

My eyes then moved to the clock that sat beside the lamp. It didn’t work because the batteries had died weeks ago and for one reason or another neither Bucky or I had ever gotten around to putting new ones in it.

Thoughts of Bucky played over and over in my mind like a binge session on Netflix until I felt my eyelids begin to get heavy. I wasn’t sure when, but at some point, my mind calmed down enough for me to drift into sleep.

I was pulled from my slumber by the whisper-like squeak of my bedroom door as it opened. Usually, someone sneaking into your room in the middle of the night would be cause for panic, but for me, it was a source of comfort. Because I knew there was only one person who would be trying to sneak into my room at this hour of the night.

I held my breath as I listened to him shuffle around the room. I heard the distinct sound of a watch being placed on top of the dresser and shoes being kicked off. Then I heard the light thump of a belt hitting the carpeted floor. I heard him let out a sigh just before the bed dipped behind me.

I silently took in a deep breath as I waited for the feeling of his arms wrapping around my waist and pulling me into his chest. But after a few minutes of waiting, I let out a sigh when I realized that it wasn’t coming.

Although he had come to bed, he wasn’t ready for the contact that I wanted. But I was used to this type of behavior from Buck after a fight. He always came back and didn’t stay gone for more than a couple hours. In fact, tonight was the longest he had ever stayed gone after a fight. But after a fight, he struggled to give the physical contact that I craved.

I fought an internal battle with myself to speak up and say something or to give him the space he needed. I didn’t want to push him, and I knew he usually required more time than I did to calm down after a fight. But if he didn’t come back from the mission, I didn’t want the last words I spoke to him to be tainted by anger and frustration.

I rolled over, so I was laying on my back. I opened my eyes and stared up at the ceiling as I tried to figure out how Buck and I had gotten to this point. It wasn’t just tonight’s fight that was weighing on me. It was the one we had two days ago and the one from last week and the one two weeks before that. It felt like Bucky, and I had been growing apart for a while now.

At first, I told myself it was just my imagination. I told myself that a couple of fights didn’t mean that we had problems in our relationship. Fights were normal, right? Everyone had fights. A disagreement here or a minor argument there was nothing to be worried about.

But then I noticed he started spending more of his free time with Steve than he did with me. But he still came to my room and held me while I fell asleep, so I didn’t question it. Everyone needed space from their partner. Maybe he was just feeling a little suffocated and needed some time with the guys. No big deal.

But as I laid there next to the man I loved, I wondered if I should have said something. Should I have fought harder for him? Should I have tried to talk about the arguments instead of brushing them off? Should I have asked him if everything was okay when he started spending more time with Steve?

Thoughts of what I could have changed or done differently played in my head until I fell back asleep. Bucky still on his side of the bed, but doing his best to not touch me.

I woke up the next morning to the sunlight shining in through the crack in the curtains. I rolled over to look at Bucky, hoping we could say goodbye before he left. But all I was met with was an empty bed. I let out a sigh and turned to pick up my phone to check the time. The team was planning on leaving for the mission at eleven. Surely, I hadn’t slept in that late, right?

I froze when I saw a note sitting on top of my phone. I would know the messy handwriting on the page anywhere. Bucky.

I reached up and rubbed my eyes, wiping the sleep from them before I picked up the piece of paper and looked at it.

Had to leave early. I’m sorry.

Lo-

\- Buck

It looked like he had started to write something underneath the first line but had decided against it, and instead just signed his name. 

I sighed realizing that I would have to wait until he came back to get a proper apology. But for now, the sloppily written note he left on my side of the bed would have to do.


End file.
